mourning the woman you were not

as I kissed his lifeless forehead
you were not thinking of me
as I told him I loved him
you were not thinking of me
as I told him I would always miss him
you were not thinking of me
as I walked with my mother behind his coffin
you were not thinking of me
as the priest spoke of death and life
you were not thinking of me
as they buried my father
you were not thinking of me
and as his loss tore into my soul like a storm
you were not thinking of me

so now I bury your memory
and when I visit your grave
which I do from time to time
I only mourn the woman that you were not

20^th July 2008